Dear That Kid That Thinks I Hate Them

Remember that time I had to ask you to be quiet three times? Or the time that I asked you to take out your earbuds while we were having a book talk? Or, just the other day, when I asked you for that project you told me you would have, but you did not have, and my shoulders sort of slumped and all the life ran out of my body? None of that meant I hate you. 


I get it. Sometimes when I tell you these things, I have angry face. Certain class periods it seems like you are the only one I ever correct. (Tangent: Just because Timmy is doing the things I am asking you to stop doing, does not mean that you should keep doing those things. If I was arrested for stealing a box of Zebra Cakes, but Timmy was stealing Zebra Cakes and didn't get caught, I still committed the crime, no? I deserve punishment. Like, I AM A ZEBRA CAKE THIEF, RIGHT? /End Rant)Believe you me, Kid That Thinks I Hate Them, I get it. Here's the secret: I was you once. I always thought my teachers were zeroed in on me, waiting for the slightest transgression. I was certain they lived to point out the multiple ways I was failing as a human. The thing I did not know then, that I do know now, is that it wasn't personal. It was strictly business. 

Unattended Zebra Cakes, ripe for the stealing.

You see, my various bouts of overtalking or general and excessive jocularity were disruptive to the class, even if I didn't know it. My teachers knew it because teaching the class was their job, and I was making their job hard. They wanted to teach thirty kids about early Mesopotamia; I wanted to make Michael Harris Mulry laugh. Sometimes, these two goals were conflicting. They did not hate me; they wanted me and everyone in the class to learn. I couldn't see that then, because I was only seeing things through the very large glasses you see pictured below.

Mr. Orlopp, his large glasses, and his BFF, Ernie.

Now the circle is complete. Where once I was the annoying student, I am the annoyed teacher. Honestly, Kid That Thinks I Hate Them, I probably like you because you remind me of young me. I want you to thrive and blossom and be the best you in the world. I want that for all my students, so sometimes I have to ask you to keep it down so everyone (including me) can focus on the task at hand. Sometimes, I am super disappointed that you did not get that project done, because I really know you can do it and it will be brilliant and I am frustrated that I can't figure out how to bring out the best in you. Sometimes, I need you to take out the earbuds and engage with the class, but I never hate you. It's strictly business. 

I hate ISIS. I hate people who hurt dogs or other animals. I hate Pitbull's entire career. Trust me on this, I do not hate you in the slightest. The truth is,That Kid That Thinks I Hate Them, what I hope you know is that, to me, you are That Kid That I Care About.